6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth

7 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth

by | Dec 1, 2017

It doesn’t take a genius to realise that there’s certain things you just don’t place in your mouth. It could be the fact that they look, taste or smell slightly rotten, or that some weird looking stranger has just handed you a bubbling green liquid. Either way, the warning signs are there, and it’s probably a safe bet not to eat either of them. However, in movies, it does seem that certain people simply lack this part of the brain, that warns them against placing strange items in your mouth. It’s not that hard really. A lovely cream cake…. Good! The heart of psychopathic undead killer… Bad! In this article we are looking the times people just forget to not to eat nasty things. When hunger strikes, don’t eat the first thing you see! Here are 7 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth.

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Toxic Brew – Street Trash (1987)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - Street Trash (1987)

When a liquor store owner finds a case of old cheap wine called “Viper” in his cellar, he decides to sell it to the local hobos at one dollar a bottle, unaware that the 60-year-old stash has turned so bad that it’s now toxic. This rancid concoction messily melts anyone that consumes this deadly drink, turning an old junkyard into a multi-coloured pit of melting bodies. Considering its dramatic effects on the human body, surely one sniff of “viper” should have been warning enough not to drink the body melting substance. Yet the homeless bums of Street Trash, glug the stuff down like it’s a bottle of 2006 Dom Perignon. Yes, the junk yard does get a nice splash of colour to brighten the place up, but on the negative side, a handful of people have just died a horribly painful death.

 

Zombie Chicken – Cooties (2014)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - Cooties (2014)

In the aptly named Ft. Chicken, Illinois, a fourth-grade student at Ft. Chicken Elementary consumes a tainted black-dotted chicken nugget, which mutates her and her fellow students into flesh eating zombies. All the warning signs were there, and young Shelly Linker should have known better than to eat the fouled food. The fact that the nugget managed to get passed quality control is a story unto itself, but surely anyone biting into the ghastly looking thing would have instantly known that something was not right? If puss spurts out when you bite into something, spit it out.

 

Parasitic Marshmallow – The Stuff (1985)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - The Stuff (1985)

The story of a new fad desert is one of many tasty layers, but the most shocking of these is its discovery. Several railroad workers find a strange white substance bubbling out of the ground, and rather than calling their boss or investigating further, one of them decided to eats it. He just dips his hand into the bubbling white stuff and puts it straight into his mouth. Now I’m no horticulturist, but I’m pretty sure that eating stuff that’s oozing up from the floor is a really bad idea. As it turns out, this substance is a parasitic, and possibly sentient organism that gradually takes over the brain, so putting into your mouth is the best way for it to go from ground to head. Not the most pleasant thing to be putting into your body, but apparently it tastes great!

 

Vampires Blood – The Lost Boys (1987) 

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - The Lost Boys (1987)

If someone warns you not to drink something that’s just been handed to you, especially if its by a group of bikers that you’ve just met, it’s probably a good idea to heed their warning. But peer pressure and the overwhelming need to fit in drives young Micheal to take a good old pull on the mysterious bottle of red liquid. He does eventually find out that it was actually vampire blood, but by then the damage is done. The wayward teen slowly starts to turn into a vampire, much to the horror of his family. That’ll teach you to go drinking some strangers bodily fluids! Still, it could have been worse, it could have been orange Tang!

 

Troll Food – Troll 2 (1990)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - Troll 2 (1990)

Clearly the cast of Troll 2 have never heard the saying “never take things from strangers?”, as their hungry bellies seems to have completely overridden that vital peice of the brain. They happily sit down to mysteriously green laced meals that appear from nowhere, without even a second to wonder where it came from. But the biggest sin has to be sipping from green bubbling drinks handed to them by a freaky witch-like woman. If a stranger handed me a bubbling broth of green goo, the last thing I’d do with it is drink it. The same can’t be said for two teens that let temptation take control as they glug on the drink like it’s punch. One melts into a nasty green and yellow puddle and the other transform into a human tree hybrid. Luckily for the Goblins trying to turn the hungry humans into vegetable matter, these characters are easily swayed by anything they can put in their mouths.

 

Free Pills – Body Melt (1993)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - Body Melt (1993)

I have a firm rule with tablets. Unless I’ve bought them from a reputable shop, or have been prescribed them by a doctor, I won’t take them. This is however not the case for the residents of Pebbles Court, who happily swallow dietary supplement pills that come “free” in the post. The “Vimuville” pills appear in their mailboxes one day and the residents devious them like they were candy from a packet. Sadly, for the poor souls that forget to check the back of the pack, these pills have dire side-effect, which include, rashes, stomach cramps and tentacles growing out from your throat. The residents slowly die off as their bodies deform and their stomach explode. Yes, pills are one of those rare things that are not made any better by adding the word free at the beginning.

 

Putrid Heart – Jason Goes to Hell: The Final Friday (1993)

6 Movie Things You’ll Regret Putting in Your Mouth - Jason Goes to Hell (1993)

Right up there on the list of things you really should not put in your mouth, has to the heart of a psychotic serial killer, who has just recently been blown to bits. Clearly the hungry coroner from Jason Goes to Hell did not get that memo, as he devours Jason Voorhees putrid heart like it was Shami Kebab on Friday night. Instead of getting heart burn and a little indigestion, the soul of Jason Voorhees take control of the coroners body, letting Jason continue his murderous rampage. He really should have order a pizza.

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“Sup Horror Fans – Well isn’t this list a little MELONcholy. But then again i’ve never been one to find food EGGSciting. BUTTER to stay on the safe side and head TROUT. See you next THYME.

Keep Rotten”

 

“Morti” The Mortician

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